So Jesus was walking along with his friends, and he was *hungry*. He saw a fig tree! Sweet!

Alas, it was out of season. No figs. “Damn you, tree!” he said. “You suck!” He kept walking, and the tree withered.

“Uh, Jesus? Dood. You just killed that tree.”

“Aw, shit,” Jesus said. He paused.

“Guys,” he said, “see, this is what exactly what I’ve been telling you. You are fucking *powerful*. Be careful what you do with it.”