Archives for 2006
Sensei asked me whether I was sore between classes, and I realized that while I’ve had pain during class, and fatigue after, I haven’t experienced any “athletic” soreness. None of that good kind I used to get when I was healthy, after a good workout. I’m pushing hard, and I’m feeling it; I don’t know [...]
Didn’t know if I’d get through again today. But of course, I managed. Didn’t even have to sit down today. Took breaks standing up. And my posture has changed. I just noticed, all of a sudden, that I’m taller. And it doesn’t hurt to hold myself up.
I will walk strong. When I cannot walk, I will stand. When I cannot stand, I will sit. When I cannot sit, I will lie down, until I can rise again. When we’re working with our arms, I often have to stop, and let my shoulders rest. I also sit down, sometimes. But no matter [...]
My son and I have been talking about lies and truth lately. (No big shock there.) We had both concluded, independently, that we don’t like “white lies,” or, in fact, any lies at all, and that authenticity is really important to both of us. Yesterday, he asked me whether there were any circumstances in which [...]
I’ve decided I should go, no matter how I feel. Today, I was more scared than I have been before. The pain when I woke up was strong, and I wondered—again—if I wouldn’t be able to do it today. Of course, once we got there, I did it. I modified things to match my ability, [...]
I woke up again feeling stiff, as always, and I thought—again—that maybe I can’t do this. Then, when I got there, I did it. And again, when it was over and I had rested (a lot) and showered, I felt great. I felt exhilarated. If I’m going to hurt, I might as well hurt doing [...]
When I got up this morning, I didn’t think I could do it. But when I got there, I decided to try. I made it through a whole Karate class. When other people jumped, I stepped. When other people did ten punches, I did five. Sometimes, I just stopped moving. Still, it wasn’t as gentle—I [...]
I’m going to do it. Karate. I must be insane.
R__ started his Karate class today. I was watching, and I wanted so much to join the class. Sitting on the bench, I followed along part of the time. I even stood up for a bit. After class, the instructor came and told me that for mother’s day, the dojo was offering moms the first [...]
I heard a PSA today that told me I should have a talk with my kids about how violence against women is wrong. Or maybe their father should have the talk. Either way, it makes no sense. Such a talk should be ridiculous. My kids would never imagine that I’d condone any kind of violence [...]
My heart is glowing because I’ve run across a truth-speaker. Heather Gold is comedian and a teacher of Open Source Management, a way for businesses to get real. Open Source Management uses ideas she’s learned from the software industry to promote authenticity and vulnerability in business. Why would business be interested? “Systems eventually fail when [...]
The movie I talked about earlier, Why We Fight, is now available from google video! I saw it in the theater, but I’m really excited that now people can see it easily. If you’re interested in really getting what’s going on with this war, you should definitely watch it. It’s not some whacked-out conspiracy thing. [...]
I keep getting lies in the mail. I’m sad about that. Today it was a letter addressed (by hand) to me, but with no return address. Inside was a newspaper clipping with a post-it that said “Angela, Check this out! – J”. There was a stamp on the envelope; it couldn’t have come from a [...]
Damn. Damn, damn damn. I wasn’t empathetic. I wasn’t loving. I wasn’t non-violent. Soulmate and I got into a heated discussion with his parents. There’s a lot of hurt there, but instead of dealing with that, I responded to anger with anger, and to accusations with accusations. It’s been two days, and I’m still feeling [...]
I hate it when I hear something on NPR, like spirituals or bluegrass or something, and I think it sounds cool, so I go buy a CD and “Ewwwwww! Why did I do that?” But I was sitting in the bookstore yesterday, and was pulled away from my thoughts by something that sounds like “Old [...]
Up late, again. I’ve noticed when something’s worrying me, I will stay up late, keeping vigil. Tonight, my task is to make sure the world doesn’t blow up. And now, a poem for your entertainment. On August 6, 1945, President Truman ordered the bombing of Hiroshima, Japan. The U.S. forces affectionately named the nuclear bomb [...]
Neil Young is streaming his new album, Living With War, at his website, www.neilyoung.com. I’m relieved to see it, hoping that things really will begin to change. On the other hand, I don’t feel very hopeful at the moment. It really seemed like things would change 40-50 years ago, before those philanderers and radicals, Martin [...]
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